I have read stories and books that miss one very important thing. Setting up an emotionally charged statement before it happens. When I’m reading dialogue it can be frustrating to get to the end of a sentence only to discover my inner-voice was way off on the tone that the character was meant to be speaking in. I call this emotional tone delay. I read said dialogue, find out the tone I imagined was wrong then have to either read it or mentally replay it in the correct tone. If it happens too often I like the book less and less and less.
How it sounds in my head as the writer isn’t necessarily the way it sounds in the readers. This is why it is so important to create a welcoming world for the reader to jump into. Show them tone and emotion instead of bludgeoning them with a tag.
“Really?” Amber said with excitement.
By putting the tag at the end, what ‘voice’ I read that in was voided. As a reader that can be annoying and then all voices sound out deadpan and the emotion is applied after the fact. It makes for some terrible visualization and fantasy.
Amber grinned and bounced on the balls of her feet. “Really?”
Sarcasm is often lost in print if I want to convey a tone of voice shows the tone by posturing the character. My rule I’ve adopted from others: Don’t get lazy and tell the tone.
“Really?” Dale said sarcastically.
Set it up properly so the reader knows it’s sarcasm or tags it with an appropriate action.
Dale inhaled slowly. “Really?” He rolled his eyes.
Creating the tone before the character speaks is important. This can be as long as a paragraph or as short as a few words. Setting the reader up for a smooth transition to the words lets them enjoy the story without having to “re-hear” it in their head before moving on. So what happens if the set up is the wrong emotion conveying action?
Scott tilted his head to the side. “Really?”
That could be humor, anger, annoyance, sarcasm or maybe tease. Normally in a story, there would be leading up to a statement like that. But I’ll pretend there isn’t and Scott’s statement is the start of the conversation or scenario. While tilting the head can convey emotion it is often a quirk or habit that without context could mean anything.
Scott crossed his arms, tilted his head to the side with his brow furrowed. “Really?”
Sure it get’s wordy, however, if I really want to show the reader how Scott feels then I will make it work. I might even take the head tilting out unless I have that as Scott’s quirk. I wouldn’t want everyone going around gesturing the same way.
Scott tilted his head to the side as a sly grin spread across his face. “Really?”
Scott’s head tilted to the side as he stifled a snicker. “Really?”
Scott’s fist slammed on the table then he tilted his head. “Really?”
If the tone isn’t foreshadowed by action before the statement, the reader will likely project their own emotion into it. That may or may not work out and may or may not put them off the story which in turn will mean devastation for the review and reader’s opinion of the story and author. I can write words and have my own idea how they are supposed to sound, but if I don’t let the reader in on it, then I’ve let them down.
My advice about acting out emotion.
I do this to keep the reader engaged, I highly recommend it. Don’t let the reader decide what ‘vocal’ tone the characters are using, show them so the meaning behind the word isn’t lost. After all, you don’t want a character to move when you mean swoon.
-Sheryl
A post or two from a while back.
Squirrelly concentration at best
Wow thanks for pointing out the problem of setting the tone of speech after the character has said it – your examples are really clear too. Great post!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks I’m glad you liked it. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Good luck for your book’s publication! Hope everything goes well 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks, it’s hard work but it’s worth it.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Good post! Explained well! I think I do it, but now I want to look back at my novels to be sure! And I can definitely use in writing short stories for upcoming collection! Thanks so much for the clarity!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks. These are generally things I’ve learned after the fact and had to go back to correct. Thus it’s been a very long process. I’m glad you found it useful.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I had a long process as well – 15 years to first publication! 😂
LikeLiked by 1 person
This is REALLY good, Elaine exclaimed ! 😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks Elaine, I do try to please.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I love this! I think I can possibly apply this to poetry too. I might have to try that sometime. Great post Sheryl!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks Rob!
LikeLiked by 1 person
You’re welcome sheryl
LikeLiked by 1 person
That is so true! I’ve read hundreds of books, probably thousands, and there are some I simply throw aside because I’ve had to go back and re-read whole paragraphs because it didn’t make sense, the follow through was missing. Thanks for the reminder Sheryl, because it is just that important.
LikeLiked by 1 person
You’re welcome for the reminder. Thanks for stopping by and leaving a comment. I can always count on you for honesty.
LikeLike
You are a keeper. I enjoy your comment, thoughts and positive outlook. You tell it like it is, but you are not mean about it. I enjoy your humour and candid remarks. Your helpful and such a delight on so many levels. Happy New Year! I hope you have a wonderful day and Year!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Aww, happy new year to you as well! It’s amazing to have such support.
LikeLike
You get what you give, and you give! positivity and support so you most definitely get it back! hehe Karma! It works in your favour! sorry couldn’t resist it, but it’s true too.
LikeLike
Pingback: How did that sound? | I wrote a book. Now what?