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Title

Title. It’s a little word only five letters long. It is a descriptive heading or caption used to give a book, chapter, song, poem, picture or anything that needs an appellation.

For such a small word it holds a significant importance. I put a lot of thought into the title of my first book, and I mean a lot.

Here are some things a title of a book should convey or contain

  1. Be part of the story at some point. Don’t call it “My blue button.” and never have anything to do with a blue button tangible or imagined. Unless blue button is a euphemism that is a major part of the story, it might not be a good title.
  2. Hold some significance to the story/characters
  3. Be short and meaningful – It’s a title, not a log line
  4. Catchy / Interesting – I’m often drawn to alliteration titles or punchy hard words.
  5. Clever – boring titles suggest a boring book
  6. Not borrowed or stolen from another book – Just don’t. Google and search to make sure it’s not accidentally copying someone else.
  7. The feel or even genre of the book –  “Loved to death.” Might not be a good romance title but might be a good suspense…

So back to my title. The title of my book has significant meaning and plays a big part in the story as it progresses. However, now I’m rewriting the book to a point where I can re-submit to Literary Agents.  I’m changing the tone of many chapters, reducing the word count by more than 24000 words(Yeah seriously ugh, at least I’m almost half way there). The catch is that I will need to change the title or it will be passed over completely. This was not advice given lightly and was given by a professional in the industry.

So I will come up with a new title for the next round of queries for the Literary agents. I will likely either work BiaAtlas back in as a subtitle or ask for it to be the full title once my book lands a publishing deal.  I’m doing this so I can give my book a second chance. Typically you cannot resubmit the same story to the same literary agents for the second time. Unless the story/prose has been changed significantly.

It is hard to say what makes a title but I know a title can make or break the chances a story has being picked up by literary agents let alone publishers. In the self-publishing industry, it is even more important as it is what will make a potential reader stop or keep scrolling past the list of titles.

So how does one find out what a good title is? Take a look at books that are in the same genre. Even ones that aren’t. What are the similarities? Whats popular? Take a look at unsuccessful books on Amazon, how do their titles differ from top sellers? A great place to get a feel for what might or might not work is a bookstore or online stores. I personally like to go and physically look at the covers.

It’s daunting to think a one to five words can make or break my chances or success. No pressure right? I’m not going to stress about it as I said before, I can change it back or work it in another way. I was told at the beginning of my journey to be flexible and not be stone hard set in my ways or having my way. It was fantastic advice that I took and take to heart.

My advice about Titles of a book.
Be willing to change it if a publisher want’s to change it. Take a look at what’s working for others but don’t copy or steal. Be creative and meaningful.

-Sheryl

Other posts that are related

The many faces of Rejection

The “word count” down.

My Posts From The Start

Copyright © 2017 All rights reserved

 

 

A Million Things

A million things make up our days. From the moment we wake up to the moment we go to bed and even during our sleep, little things happen. They happen around us and in our heads.

Those things make up the basics of our everyday life; sometimes they’re mundane like clipping toenails to the fantastic like going for a hot air balloon ride. Daily events can be predictable like how long it takes for the bread to toast all the way to unpredictable such as parking on the side of the road and dropping your car keys down a sewer drain.

When I’m writing I tend to shuffle the predictable moment to a generalization in the story. Using mundane every-day tasks in storytelling to show something about a character is… boring.

Exhausted, Amber picked up her tooth brush, applied the toothpaste in a modest amount. She dipped the bristles and paste under the water and raised it to her mouth with a grimace. Slowly in circles, as she was taught, she meticulously cleaned her teeth. The minty taste causing a frown as it always did. With all her teeth scrubbed and clean she spit out the foam into the sink. Grabbing her cup she took a mouthful of water and sloshed it about rinsing out the offensive mint paste.

Using a predictable moment like this, one that is done daily by everyone is boring. It is a terrible way to convey that amber is hygienic and hates mint flavor. It can be assumed that someone would be brushing their teeth daily. The only time to mention this is briefly or in an opposite way that makes the moment more memorable.

Exhausted, Amber applied the toothpaste to her toothbrush and grimaced as she prepared for the disgusting mint flavor. It was all wrong; the fragrance of the mint was too strong and it tasted bitter, not sweet. Her eyes flew open wide as She looked quickly to the tube in her hand realizing she just put A535 in her mouth. 

While still a mundane moment it wasn’t as boring to read because something unusual happened. Unpredictable things make life interesting. Therefore they make stories more interesting.

If I find a chapter is dragging on or isn’t quite right I’ll look for the mundane everyday crap that I’ve plunked in as filler. I’ll decide if it needs to be removed or if I can at least make it more interesting to read. Usually, it can be taken out unless it’s a foreshadow for something important later on or if it’s genuinely needed for character establishment.

If I find a chapter is mostly mundane I might even just slash it all out and sum it up in conversation.

Amber sat heavily in her desk chair.
“You look tired,” Dale asked peeking around the divider.
“Ugh. I used A535 on my toothbrush last night and to top it off the freaking mint smell kept me up all night.” She scowled at Dale as he snickered behind his hand. “It’s not funny.”
“Totally is. Did ”
Dale started laughing, her frown turned into pursed lips before she laughed along. He had a way of making her feel better. 

My point is that I try to hunt out these drab moments where I might use hair brushing to describe characters physical features or an everyday action to make a point. Leaving a paragraph or chapter of boring everyday happenings might turn the reader off and might make me look lazy as a writer.  I take my revision process to add in foreshadows for later and adding tidbits to boring moments is a great way to do that.

My advice about ordinary moments.
Try to find them and either take them out or spice them up. Try something startling, funny or dramatic. If it can foreshadow an event later, even better. 

-Sheryl

Other posts

Blood

Sweat

+ Tears

Copyright © 2017 All rights reserved

Fragrance

Whether or not it matters

I’m going to give a quick shout out to something that affects us daily in one way or another. Something that can change the course of plans in a heartbeat. Emotions are tied to it directly and indirectly. It is something that is talked about so much that the news and special television stations dedicate time to it.  I may have touched on this before, but recently it was brought to my attention again. The ultimate setting maker or destroyer.  Everyone everywhere is affected buy it and it’s completely out of our control.

The weather. Whether or not I use it, whether or not it matters, is solely based on my remembering to include it.  I’m not talking about a full paragraph or two describing the shape, color, and texture of the cumulonimbus cloud or how the sun hits the sidewalk perfectly. I’m talking about basic behind the scenes acknowledgment for a simple scene. A casual injection of what the outside world is up to beyond that it is day or night, without dragging it out unnecessarily.  I can wax poetic on the sun and moon all I want, but they are not the weather, they are part of the setting for weather and a time of day indicator. Sure, I mention them.  So what? The sentence says it’s sunny. That doesn’t tell me if I need a bathing suit, sweater or full on arctic snow gear because sunny in February means your face will be hurting for sure. “It’s sunny and warm out” is boring. In fact, I’ve read some pretty lame “show” of the sun and rain etc. I’ve read some over the top super-flowery, oh-my-God-will-it-ever-end descriptions of the rain. It’s rain we all know that it falls from the sky and it’s wet. But how is it falling? How does it physically interact or effect?

Different weather can bring different interactions we all know how to look up alternate words for the specific weather to bring in the variations of artistic description. Here are some examples of showing the weather and the results of it in the environment.

Windy

Blowing hair
Something was taken from a hand by a gust
Things falling over like trees or signs
Something important blowing away
Leaves rustling or skittering across the ground
Skirt fluttering

The gust pushed her to the edge of the sidewalk, her shoe tipped and her ankle rolled. Falling to the ground she yelped in pain.

Snow

Flakes landing on lashes
Can’t see the car ahead for the whiteout
The crunch beneath the boot
The cool fresh smell The sparkle of the newly fallen flakes in the lamplight

The sounds of the night were muffled by the large tufts of white, floating gently to the earth.

Rain

Dripping down the face
Sticking the hair to the neck
Soaking the clothes
The patter against a window pain
Rinsing away the dirt on the street
Washing away the evidence

The umbrella did little to protect her as the wind pushed hard, soaked in seconds she trudged on.

Fog  A splendid setting for horror or suspense. But also romance if you want it to.

Reduced visibility
Subdued details
Cool damp micro droplets gathering on the hairs of one’s arm
The swirl in the mist as a car drove by

Jess walked slowly and listened for what she couldn’t see beyond two meters around her. The soft grey-white air smelled as damp as it felt on her skin.

Heat

Sweat, trickling, dripping, running, glistening etc.
Sticky clothes
Lethargy
Mirage
Bone dry
Cracking soil
Burning hot surface

Alice sat back on the porch. As wonderful as a new glass of iced lemonade would be, the effort to get it was too much. The meager shade provided no refuge as she waited for her brother to get home.

Cloudless sky aka sunny (Yeah I know)

Applies sunblock
Puts on a sun hat
Puts on sunglasses
Pulls down the visor of the car while driving
Shades eyes with hand as she opens the gate
Shadow play: The disappearing shadows of noon. The elongated evening shadows.

Kevin squinted as he looked up at the sign. He lifted his hand to shade his eyes and sighed heavily. “Four more blocks.”  

 When I’m writing weather into my story if it’s not a significant part of the chapter or story I will keep it just for setting embellishment. But if it can be melded into an important interaction…

 Sasha gingerly sidestepped the glittering puddle. She didn’t see the man approaching deep in conversation with his partner. He bumped Sasha’s arm teetering her off balance and directly into leftovers of last night’s storm.
“Seriously?” She jumped out of the water stomping her feet to shake off the dirty water.
The man turned long enough to mutter, “Sorry.” Before continuing on.
“Bad morning?”
Sasha looked up from examining her shoes to see Cal holding out a real cotton handkerchief. “It’s clean.”
“Thank you.” Before she could shift her briefcase to take it he squatted and patted her shoe dry than the other. “You didn’t have to do that.”
Cal stood and tucked the handkerchief into the inside pocket of his gray suit jacket. Tall dark, handsome hero in a well-fitted suit the color of armor. She nearly giggled at his sincere gesture.
“You have your hands full, I don’t.” He casually waved his hand at the café behind him. “Coffee?”
“Well, since mine was knocked from my hands earlier by a jerk kid on a skateboard and you were so medievally kind, the least I can do is buy you a cup Detective.”
“Hmm bad morning indeed.”
They walked the short distance to the Cozy café and he held the door open for her. The name did it justice, dark wood, and cushioned booths. The tables near the windows all taken so they found a booth.
“How were you carrying a coffee with all that?” He nodded toward the briefcase, laptop bag, lunch bag, and camera case she set down before taking off her jacket.
The warm café was a welcome reprieve.
“Way earlier and I didn’t have my hands full then. Surveying the area she sat across from Cal. “Cops.” She frowned.

“The station is just around the corner Sasha.”
“I know, I don’t usually come this way. I was…” She stopped explaining while the waitress filled the mugs already on the table.
“Anything else?”
“Just coffee thank you.” Sasha started putting sugar in hers with cream.
Cal agreed and eyed the camera case. “You stopped at the park to take pictures of rain on the leaves and flowers as the sun came up.”
Her mouth fell open. “I did.”
“Don’t look so surprised. Those old-fashioned gardens on a morning like this are bound to draw an artist. Though you’re not dressed for it.”
“Oh, I changed my shoes in the car. I left it by the park and thought the walk would improve my mood before I have to face… um, go to work.”
“Hmm.” Cal sipped his steaming black coffee

…  

Valery squinted at the early morning sun and tugged at her scarf. She unzipped her jacket as she got into her car. Sliding the key into the ignition, she started the engine immediately turning the heat off. She slipped her sunglasses into place thinking of bagels and hot coffee as she drove the short distance to work.

Chancing a sip of her coffee at a red light Valery watched the people cross. The cup paused halfway to her mouth. Setting it in the cup-holder, she stared open mouthed until the couple deep in conversation passed.
Sasha you little minx. What secrets have you been keeping from me?Valery’s chuckle startled herself. You didn’t even notice me. I sincerely need to know what you’re up to.
Smiling as the light turned green, her tires spun on the still wet road as she hit the gas. Going to work was less of a drag now. Why was Sasha walking to work with the handsome guy from the bar last week?

If I needed to make the weather more of a factor I would, but unless an epic journey is delayed by a snowstorm or two someone’s are trapped romantically by a sudden downpour I don’t punch my readers in the face with the weather. It’s there, it always is and should be, I just don’t think it has to rule every scenario if it’s not needed.

My advice about the weather and whether or not to use it.
Even if it’s not a key part of the plot/story mention it to set the scene, it’s as important as clothes. The reader might not need every single blow-your-brains-out detail but a little tidbit is enough to fill in the mental canvas adequately.

-Sheryl

Other posts

Doubt clouds out creativity

Tulips in July

Copyright © 2016 All rights reserved

Gate

Too Much To Do…

Recently I’ve been thinking a lot about the story writing process. There is so much more to it than just writing the story. There’s plot structure, the story arch, characters, character development, sub plots, side stories, foreshadows, and so much more.

There’s plot structure, the story arch, characters, character development, sub plots, side stories, foreshadows, settings, story flow and so much more.

Then there is the editing and revision portion. This part seems to be ongoing for me. With this, there are options too. Self-editing, friends editing, professional editing and computer program assisted editing.

Following the editing, there is the ‘getting your book’ published phase. Once again there are options. First, is finding a literary agent by querying them with a query letter and synopsis. Second is vanity press/indie publishing and third is self-publishing.

It all seems rather daunting when summarized and that’s because it is. It is a big task and hard to do. Of course, there will be those that seem to ‘luck’ out and get published with minimal effort and those that struggle and give up after years of rejection.

When I look at this process I always have the grand scope of it in my mind, however, I only focus on the task or ‘stage’ at hand. Right now I’m re-writing and revising my book. It’s a big task but a necessary one. I know the next step will be putting it out there again to literary agents.

This will require me to rewrite my query and synopsis completely. A task I know is coming up and is in my mind but not my focus at the moment.

Once I have the rewrite done I will move on to the next phase and that’s using a computer program to assist with grammar and structure revision.

After that, I have plans to look into a professional editor to assist with the polishing of the book, the query, and synopsis. That’s not soon so I think about it but not too much. One thing at a time for me.

It can quickly become overwhelming if I think too far ahead to all that needs to be done. I get that ‘too much to do’ panic and it can bog me down or derail me fast. So I slow down, sit back and take stock of it all then get back to focusing on what needs to be done first.

My advice about thinking too much.
There is enough stress in life you don’t need to add the anxiety of over thinking the book writing/publishing process and adding to it. Be aware of it, and plan for it but put most of the focus on the task at hand.

-Sheryl

I couldn’t find a way to work Edible into this blog so I’ll link one that already had it… Redundantly Redundant Redundancies 

Related posts

Read, revise and repeat. The shampoo process of editing.

Glance back to look forward

My Posts From The Start

Copyright © 2017 All rights reserved

 

Outside Forces

On my vacation journeys, I found ample time to people watch. I saw some pretty interesting action/reactions that I myself would not do or say. This is important as a writer to understand that other people are different in many ways.

I talk about behavior a lot because it’s important to any character and story to evolve characters and who they are. Or even make sure they don’t evolve, that they stay exactly who they started off as. Or make them de-evolve into the ‘bad guy’. Either way, as they bumble along, it’s important that they have reactions to situations.

Personality can be affected by outside forces. These extenuating circumstances can often cause a character to act… well out of character.

What outside forces am I talking about? The kind that can suddenly or even gradually force a person to act irrationally in one single moment or over a designated period of time.

Here are a few examples:

hunger/low blood sugar
Sun/Overheating
Sudden weather change

Thirst
Headache/Illness
Other people’s screaming children/loud noises
Bad Drivers

Greif*
Shock/fright
Injury/Pain
Exhaustion
Drugs
Alcohol

*While grief is an emotion, it is caused/forced by outside forces and is not(hopefully not) an everyday emotion.

It’s important to make sure that they still have some of their personality within the moment or shortly after. Also, note that it can be frustrating to have everyone that’s “Drunk” Behaves the same or have everyone “grieving” reacting exactly the same. If you’ve ever been to a funeral or watched a movie with one in it, you can see that individuals act individually. While variation doest mean I would have people acting in extremes (Unless necessary) I would have subtle differences or meaningful moments of uncharacteristic behavior that has a poignant place in the story or character development.

My advice about outside forces.
When used well they can add a dynamic and depth to any character. They can show perfect Pauline has a limit to her seemingly unending patience or that Fury driven Frank has a soft spot for kittens being abandoned in a garbage bag at the side of the road. 

-Sheryl

Other people posts

People Watching

Static Vs. Dynamic

My Posts From The Start

Copyright © 2017 All rights reserved

Bumble

Who Would Do What?

I recently spent a day at a theme park. It was hot, fun and full of a wide range of emotions. A fun little writing exercise I thought of while waiting in line for a ride has sparked today’s post.  My imagination run’s wild at times.

I like to think a lot about characters and how each behaves differently from the other. How would they react in certain situations?

More importantly, how would each character act if put in the same situation. It would be erroneous to believe they would act the same or all act the way I would have behaved.

I want to make sure I keep my characters individual as possible. That doesn’t mean that they can’t react the same, but that some would not. So how does that work? How can I keep enough variety?

I’ll start by setting up the scenario so you don’t have to read it over and over.

It’s a hot sunny day at a loud and overly busy theme park. The line up to get on to a popular ride is at least an hour-long. There is no shade and irritability is a common sound among parents hissing ‘stop’ at their children.

This particular ride is terrifyingly tall and raises the riders to the top to drop them quickly. Every time I looked up at it some would grit their teeth, some would pale while others would become excited and some nervous.  It has six sets of four seats in a row. Groups of people vary in size.  The excited and relieved people corralled in the staging gates are let into the area to find seating. A lone rider sits leaving a single seat open on a row of three unbeknownst to him. A family of four wants to ride together but there is only the single seat on one side and the three empty beside the single rider on the opposite side.

Example 1

“Excuse me, sir. Would you mind moving to the single seat on the other side so we can ride together?” The father asked.
“Oh, yeah sure. I didn’t realize there was an empty seat.” He said getting up to move.
“Thanks, man.” The father smiled. 
“No Problem.”

Example 2

“Excuse me, sir. Would you mind moving to the single seat on the other side so we can ride together?” The father asked.
The man threw his eyes up to the sky. “Fine. Even though I just freaking sat down and buckled in.” He said begrudgingly.
“I appreciate it man, thanks.”
“Sure whatever.” The man stalked off to the other side to sit.

Example 3

“Excuse me, sir. Would you mind moving to the single seat on the other side so we can ride together?” The father asked.
“I do.”
“It would be nice.” The father prompted. “We’d like to sit together.”
“Not my problem.” The man ignored the protests of the children for the separation.

Example 4

“Excuse me, sir. Would you mind moving to the single seat on the other side so we can ride together?” The father asked.
“Piss off.”
The tired family separated unhappily yet silently.

With each example, I had the single rider’s response increase in hostility. There are infinite ways this could go. The father could involve the ride attendants. The man could involve the ride attendants. They could get physical and evicted from the park. The ride attendant could get physical with the belligerent single rider.  The family could have been lying about the one empty seat and the single rider would have to wait another turn. Karma could get either and the ride breakdown.

How a person responds is as important as how a person initiates.

Example 5

“Seriously? Come on man there’s a single seat on the other side. We want to ride together.” The father said frustrated.
The man looked at the Father, seeing he was tired from the long day…

Again the single rider can respond in any way from polite to outright rage. This would depend on who that person is on a basic level. Unless there are extenuating circumstances well foreshadowed I wouldn’t have someone kind and calm, tell the man to Piss off.

Assessing the possibilities of alternate outcomes can also lead to possibly a more interesting angle, change the story or direction completely or cement the readers’ feelings toward a specific character, which is very important to do. If a reader doesn’t care one way or the other they might just stop reading or complain about wasting their time.

My advice about exploring the possibilities.
It’s honestly a lot of fun and if you take the time to try you might find a better angle or even another angle for another story altogether.

-Sheryl

Other reactive posts

What Do I Do About That?

What’s Your Story?

My Posts From The Start   

Copyright © 2017 All rights reserved

Grit

Dashing Dashes

This will be the last re-post as my Vacation time winds down.  I picked this one at random, for no reason whatsoever.

Dashing Dashes

I recently mentioned the use of ellipses. Used in dialogue sometimes they are erroneously used in place of what should actually be a dash.

What’s the difference? Good question.

Ellipses… are three consecutive dots that generally indicate words, sentences or entire sections are being left out.

Dashes – indicate dialogue, speech or something is being interrupted or cut off. A dash is the punctuation. No periods, question marks or exclamation points are used.

Example time:

The tone is set by punctuation.

Dale crossed his arms and scowled. “I don’t think…”

“No, you don’t think Dale. That’s the entire problem.” Scott waved his hand dismissively at Dale. 

In that example, Dale comes across unsure or hesitant. That is not the tone I want to portray. Let me try again with a dash.

Dale crossed his arms and scowled. “I don’t think-”

“No, you don’t think Dale. That’s the entire problem.” Scott waved his hand dismissively at Dale. 

I wanted Scott to cut Dale off rudely. Scott is slipping and I want his rude factor to go up. With Ellipses, Scott was just mean-ish. With a dash, he was both rude and mean.

In some circumstances, I’ll make the cut off more obvious.

Amber handed Rachael the Envelope. “I need you to go down to-”
Rachael flicked her hand cutting Amber off. “I know where to take the Quill Company proofs.” She snatched the paper from Amber’s hand.

I just love making mean people mean. In Rachael’s case, she has just cause to dislike Amber and be short with her. Both Amber and Rachael’s lifestyles, attitudes and personalities conflict. Not all cut off’s are a personality flaw, in this moment Rachael is annoyed with Amber, she’s not usually rude in this manner.

Some programs such as *Word or *Microsoft Office don’t allow dashes in dialogue. When this happens I leave the punctuation out, cap it off with the quotation mark and manually go back to add the dash.

“I think we should-“  “ mark is curled the wrong way!  Ugh. Word automatically does this and it drives me bonkers. I go back and fix it manually.
“I think we should”   “I think we should-”

Maybe I’m missing a setting or something, maybe not. I’ll probably end up looking into it. While this manual fix is not efficient, it works for me. Like with all good things I would probably pick one character that might lean on this rude behavior as a quirk. A foreshadow of their true selves. Arguments are a good place to use them or for a character to make a point by cutting someone off.

My advice about Dashes.
They are an abrupt interruption, not a trailing off. Be careful who you have rudely interrupting conversation. Too much might make everyone come across as a jerk.

-Sheryl

Other  posts

The jerk-face warrior

Glance back to look forward

My Posts From The Start

Copyright © 2017 All rights reserved
Lifestyle

Quill

What Did You Mean? – Re-blog

Still in vacation mode and don’t want to be tethered to my computer. Therefore I’m sharing another blog that was posted a long time ago. Don’t worry my people watching opportunities have given me some ideas for new posts that I will write and post soon.

What Did You Mean?

I have read stories and books that miss one very important thing. Setting up an emotionally charged statement before it happens.  When I’m reading dialogue it can be frustrating to get to the end of a sentence only to discover my inner-voice was way off on the tone that the character was meant to be speaking in. I call this emotional tone delay. I read said dialogue, find out the tone I imagined was wrong then have to either read it or mentally replay it in the correct tone.  If it happens too often I like the book less and less and less.

How it sounds in my head as the writer isn’t necessarily the way it sounds in the readers. This is why it is so important to create a welcoming world for the reader to jump into. Show them tone and emotion instead of bludgeoning them with a tag.

“Really?” Amber said with excitement.

By putting the tag at the end, what ‘voice’ I read that in was voided. As a reader that can be annoying and then all voices sound out deadpan and the emotion is applied after the fact. It makes for some terrible visualization and fantasy.

Amber grinned and bounced on the balls of her feet. “Really?” 

Sarcasm is often lost in print if I want to convey a tone of voice shows the tone by posturing the character. My rule I’ve adopted from others: Don’t get lazy and tell the tone.

“Really?” Dale said sarcastically.  

Set it up properly so the reader knows it’s sarcasm or tags it with an appropriate action.

Dale inhaled slowly. “Really?” He rolled his eyes.

Creating the tone before the character speaks is important. This can be as long as a paragraph or as short as a few words. Setting the reader up for a smooth transition to the words lets them enjoy the story without having to “re-hear” it in their head before moving on.  So what happens if the set up is the wrong emotion conveying action?

Scott tilted his head to the side. “Really?” 

That could be humor, anger, annoyance, sarcasm or maybe tease. Normally in a story, there would be leading up to a statement like that. But I’ll pretend there isn’t and Scott’s statement is the start of the conversation or scenario. While tilting the head can convey emotion it is often a quirk or habit that without context could mean anything.

Scott crossed his arms, tilted his head to the side with his brow furrowed. “Really?”

Sure it get’s wordy, however, if I really want to show the reader how Scott feels then I will make it work. I might even take the head tilting out unless I have that as Scott’s quirk. I wouldn’t want everyone going around gesturing the same way.

Scott tilted his head to the side as a sly grin spread across his face. “Really?”

Scott’s head tilted to the side as he stifled a snicker. “Really?”

Scott’s fist slammed on the table then he tilted his head. “Really?”

If the tone isn’t foreshadowed by action before the statement, the reader will likely project their own emotion into it. That may or may not work out and may or may not put them off the story which in turn will mean devastation for the review and reader’s opinion of the story and author.  I can write words and have my own idea how they are supposed to sound, but if I don’t let the reader in on it, then I’ve let them down.

My advice about acting out emotion.
I do this to keep the reader engaged, I highly recommend it. Don’t let the reader decide what ‘vocal’ tone the characters are using, show them so the meaning behind the word isn’t lost. After all, you don’t want a character to move when you mean swoon. 

-Sheryl

A post or two from a while back.

Squirrelly concentration at best

Time to take out the trash

My Posts From The Start

Copyright © 2016 All rights reserved

Tether

That is disgusting

I know this is a post from a long while ago. Since I’m on vacation, I decided to sail through today and share one of my old favourites.  Don’t worry I’ll get back to new and fun posts shortly.

That is disgusting

People can be gross, I mean really gross. They do things that make me cringe.

When a character does something disgusting and it’s shown and not told, I will be disgusted too. And that is the entire point of reading a book. I want to be in the story. I want to feel it.

For example:

Billy sat in the back corner of the coffee shop. In one hand, he held his book. With the other, he carefully dislodged a decent clump of moist mucus from his nose. After examining his generous prize, he rolled it between his thumb and forefinger as he continued to read. Without a thought, he flicked the carefully constructed ball. He happened to see it plunk into the cup of coffee on the table next to his.

He glanced around quickly, nobody was looking. Nobody witnessed the once in a lifetime accidental shot. Feigning interest in his book, the devil in his head urged him to silence. He watched the snotty woman in a pale green sweater sip her coffee-surprise. Had she not been so incredibly rude to him earlier he might have spoken up. Then again, he might not have.

When the woman finished her present, Billy got up to leave, pausing at her table.

“Good coffee?”

She looked up from her tablet, her face morphed into a sneer and she tutted. “It’s a latte, and I’m still not interested in someone,” she looked him up and down, “like you.” She dismissed him completely giving her tablet her attention.

Billy walked away, a slow satisfied smile creeping to his lips.

I loved writing this because Billy the bad-guy is as much a victim as the woman who is horrible in her own way.

Billy has a habit. He likes to pick his nose. It’s called rhinotillexis. If he eats it, it’s called Mucophagy. Does the reader need to know the specific detail of what the act is called? Maybe. If it’s relevant to the story. Otherwise, leave it as a quirk or bad habit.

Cringe worthy things happen all the time. Like when someone hands you money that was carefully tucked away in her sweaty cleavage. What bothers you might not bother someone else.

My advice about grossing out your readers.

If it gives you the heebie-jeebies or turns your stomach, it’s safe to use. My example was a very long way to say, – He picked his nose, flicked it into the shrew’s drink and watched as she drank it. – Blech.

-Sheryl

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Sail

Happy 150th Canada!

Tomorrow is a pretty big deal, I’ll be busy celebrating and whooping it up to celebrate Canada’s 150th. Picnic’s, snacks, barbecues, parties and fireworks galore.

I can easily say I’m proud to be Canadian. So what are we celebrating?

In 1534 the colony of Canada was established, however, we celebrate the “birth” of Canada from July 1st, 1867. That is when the colonies of Canada; Ontario, Quebec, Nova Scotia and New Brunswick united to become the Dominion of Canada. Thus we celebrate the anniversary or birthday of Canada on July 1st of every year.

To all Canadians, young and old, to those born here and those that chose to be here,  let your patriotic flag sail and be proud to be Canadian.

To all those from other countries, celebrate the day for whatever reason you have. Whether it’s love, achievements or just that the sky is a lovely shade of blue. Choose something and celebrate the day.

To my lovely followers, what country are you from and what is your most favourite thing about it?

-Sheryl

150

Canadian National Anthem in English

O Canada!
Our home and native land!
True patriot love, in all thy sons command.

With glowing hearts we see thee rise,
The True North strong and free!

From far and wide,
O Canada, we stand on guard for thee.

God keep our land glorious and free!
O Canada, we stand on guard for thee.

O Canada, we stand on guard for thee.

Canadian National Anthem in French

O Canada! Terre de nos aïeux,
Ton front est ceint de fleurons glorieux!

Car ton bras sait porter l’épée,
Il sait porter la croix!

Ton histoire est une épopée
Des plus brillants exploits.

Et ta valeur, de foi trempée,
Protégera nos foyers et nos droits.

Protégera nos foyers et nos droits. 

 

 

 

 

Snack