Six Word Story Challenge – Treason

Six word story challenge

Six Word Story Challenge

Here is this week’s six-word story challenge. This prompt is now hosted by Wonderwall360 and Kirstwrites. Once a week they post a one-word prompt, and we get to create a six-word story in response. At the end of the week, there is a Poll for everyone to vote for their favorite story and the winners get a badge. Even if you don’t participate in the prompt, you can still vote for your top three picks at the end of the week.

The prompt this week is:

Treason

What six words would you use to tell a story about the prompt?

Join the fun and tell us a six-word story.

My story:

“His arrow missed his corrupt King.

aaa4

Come on over to tell your six-word story to this week prompt. Click on the image below to participate in this week’s prompt and leave your story in the comments to participate.

Six Word Story icon.pnghttps://wonderwall360.blog/2018/11/03/six-word-story-challenge-enter-until-9pm-thursday-8th-november/

 

Don’t forget to check out, share and follow the new daily prompt I host. A new word every day!
Your Daily click

 

 

 

Advertisements

Six Word Story Challenge – HISTORY

Six word story challenge

Six Word Story Challenge

Here is this week’s six-word story challenge. This prompt is now hosted by Wonderwall360 and Kirstwrites. Once a week they post a one-word prompt, and we get to create a six-word story in response. At the end of the week, there is a Poll for everyone to vote for their favorite story and the winners get a badge. Even if you don’t participate in the prompt, you can still vote for your top three picks at the end of the week.

The prompt this week is:

History

What six words would you use to tell a story about the word Grandmother?

Join the fun and tell us a six-word story.

My story:

“Document our victory.

Whitewash it?

Unquestionably.”

Come on over to tell your six-word story to this week prompt. Click on the image below to participate in this week’s prompt and leave your story in the comments to participate.

Six Word Story icon.pnghttps://kirstwrites.wordpress.com/2018/10/27/sixwordstorychallenge-27th-october/comment-page-1/#comment-3288

 

Don’t forget to check out, share and follow the new daily prompt I host. A new word every day!
Your Daily click

Today’s daily prompt is MASQUERADE
https://onedailyprompt.wordpress.com/2018/10/27/your-daily-word-prompt-masquerade-October-27-2018/

 

 

Six Word Story Challenge – Grandmother

Six word story challenge

Six Word Story Challenge

Here is this week’s six-word story challenge. This prompt is now hosted by Wonderwall360 and Kirstwrites. Once a week they post a one-word prompt, and we get to create a six-word story in response. At the end of the week, there is a Poll for everyone to vote for their favorite story and the winners get a badge. Even if you don’t participate in the prompt, you can still vote for your top three picks at the end of the week.

The prompt this week is:

Grandmother

What six words would you use to tell a story about the word Grandmother?

Join the fun and tell us a six-word story.

My story:

“Daughters’ adopted baby is loved unconditionally. ”

Come on over to tell your six-word story to this week prompt. Click on the image below to participate in this week’s prompt and leave your story in the comments to participate.

Six Word Story icon.pnghttps://wonderwall360.blog/2018/10/20/6word-story-challenge-enter-up-until-9pm-gmt-thursday-25th-october/comment-page-1/#comment-2005

Don’t forget to check out, share and follow the new daily prompt I host. A new word every day!
Your Daily click

Today’s daily prompt is ENCHANT https://onedailyprompt.wordpress.com/2018/10/23/your-daily-word-prompt-enchant-October-23-2018/

 

 

Six Word Story Challenge – Superstition

Six word story challenge

Six Word Story Challenge

Here is this week’s six-word story challenge. This prompt is now hosted by Wonderwall360 and Kirstwrites. Once a week they post a one-word prompt, and we get to create a six-word story in response. At the end of the week, there is a Poll for everyone to vote for their favorite story and the winners get a badge. Even if you don’t participate in the prompt, you can still vote for your top three picks at the end of the week.

The prompt this week is:

Superstition

What six words would you use to tell a story about the word Superstition? Silly or SCARY, superstitions are a global phenomenon.

Join the fun and tell us a six-word story.

My story:

“Fate unveiled; Old Wives told true. ”

Come on over to tell your six-word story to this week prompt. Click on the image below to participate in this week’s prompt and leave your story in the comments to participate.

Six Word Story icon.pnghttps://kirstwrites.wordpress.com/2018/10/13/sixwordstorychallenge-13th-october/

Don’t forget to check out, share and follow the new daily prompt I host. A new word every day!
Your Daily click

Today’s daily prompt is SCARY. How scary can you be?
https://onedailyprompt.wordpress.com/2018/10/13/your-daily-word-prompt-scary-October-13-2018/

 

 

Six Word Story Challenge – Princess

Six Word Story Challenge

Here is this week’s six-word story challenge. This prompt is now hosted by Wonderwall360 and Kirstwrites. Once a week they post a one-word prompt, and we get to create a six-word story in response. At the end of the week, there is a Poll for everyone to vote for their favorite story and the winners get a badge. Even if you don’t participate in the prompt, you can still vote for your top three picks at the end of the week.

The prompt this week is:

Princess

What six words would you use to tell a story about the word Princess?

Join the fun and tell us a six-word story.

My story:

“Tiara by day; cowl by night.”

Come on over to tell your six-word story to this week prompt. Click on the image below to participate in this week’s prompt and leave your story in the comments to participate.

Six Word Story icon.pnghttps://wonderwall360.blog/2018/10/06/6-word-story-challenge-week-commencing-saturday-6th-october/comment-page-1/#comment-1906

Don’t forget to check out, share and follow the new daily prompt I host. A new word every day!
Your Daily click

 

 

That Is Disgusting – Throwback Thursday Style #TBT

Good morning, it’s Thursday, and that means I’m going to post a throwback from my earlier posts. Essentially a re-post of an old archived post with new notes and observations. 

tbt 3

Anything added(except grammar and spelling corrections) are marked in green within the original Post’s text. 

The next post I’m going to revisit is That Is Disgusting . Originally posted on Aug 26, 2016 8:04 AM. The reason I’m revisiting is that I love how gross it is and it reminds me that people can be disgusting. Also, this is a good opportunity to show how I would now revise this story to remove the overly abundant filter words etc.

 That is disgusting

That Is Disgusting

People can be gross, I mean really gross. They do things that make me cringe. (People can still be super gross. That hasn’t changed)

When a character does something disgusting and it’s shown and not told, I will be disgusted too. And that is the entire point of reading a book. I want to be in the story. I want to feel it.

I will highlight filter words adverbs and words ending in ING.

For example:

Billy sat in the back corner of the coffee shop. In one hand, he held his book. With the other, he carefully dislodged a decent clump of moist mucus from his nose. After examining his generous prize, he rolled it between his thumb and forefinger as he continued to read. Without a thought, he flicked the carefully constructed ball. He happened to see it plunk into the cup of coffee on the table next to his.

He glanced around quickly, nobody was looking. Nobody Witnessed the once in a lifetime accidental shot. Feigning interest in his book, the devil in his head urged him to silence. He watched the snotty woman in a pale green sweater sip her coffee-surprise. Had she not been so incredibly rude to him earlier he might have spoken up. Then again, he might not have.

When the woman finished her present, Billy got up to leave, pausing at her table.

“Good coffee?”

She looked up from her tablet, her face morphed into a sneer and she tutted. “It’s a latte, and I’m still not interested in someone,” she looked him up and down, “like you.” She dismissed him completely giving her tablet her attention.

Billy walked away, a slow, satisfied smile creeping to his lips.

I loved writing this because Billy the bad-guy is as much a victim as the woman who is horrible in her own way.

Today, I would revise the sentences to remove the adverbs etc.

After examining his generous prize,
After he examined his generous prize,

Without a thought, he flicked the carefully constructed ball.

I might or might not change the second example with ‘carefully’ that one’s not too bad.

He happened to see it plunk into the cup of coffee on the table next to his.
The ball plunked into the cup of coffee on the table next to his.

This one was easy, I get wordy and the first four words were unnecessary. 

This entire next sentence would now be removed. It is unnecessary since I say the same thing worded differently in the next sentence. 

He glanced around quickly, nobody was looking.
He glanced around quickly, nobody was looking.

Feigning interest in his book,
Billy feigned interest in his book,

Sometimes a rewrite of a sentence is needed. 

Had she not been so incredibly rude to him earlier he might have spoken up.
Had she had chosen to be polite to him earlier he might have spoken up.

When the woman finished her present, Billy got up to leave, pausing at her table.
Once she finished her gooey gift, Billy stood to leave and paused at her table.

When I revise with the ING, adverbs, filter words and crutch words highlighted, I often find ways to improve a sentence beyond fixing just the immediate problem words.

She dismissed him completely giving her tablet her attention.
She dismissed him and gave her tablet her attention.

Sometimes removing words that are unnecessary such as “Completely” will strengthen a sentence. Now if I were to “Show” a bit more, I would write it like this:

She dismissed him with a flick of her hand then gave her tablet her attention.

The last example has “walking” in it. A double whammy. Walk and ING. I can do better.

Billy walked away, a slow satisfied smile creeping to his lips.
Billy sauntered away, as a slow, satisfied smile crept to his lips.

While a thesaurus is good to replace some “Walk” out, not all of them need to go and it is important to be careful what word you replace it with. Sashay or traipse would not work here. I don’t replace all incidences of Walk, walked or walking but I do check to see if there is a better alternative.

Billy has a habit. He likes to pick his nose. It’s called rhinotillexis. If he eats it, it’s called Mucophagy. Does the reader need to know the specific detail of what the act is called? Maybe. If it’s relevant to the story. Otherwise, leave it as a quirk or bad habit.

Cringe-worthy things happen all the time. Like when someone hands you money that was carefully tucked away in her abundant sweaty cleavage. What bothers you might not bother someone else.

Here is the newly revised story.

Billy sat in the back corner of the coffee shop. In one hand, he held his book. With the other, he carefully dislodged a decent clump of moist mucus from his nose. After he examined his generous prize, he rolled it between his thumb and forefinger as he continued to read. Without a thought, he flicked the carefully constructed ball. The ball plunked into the cup of coffee on the table next to his.

Nobody Witnessed the once in a lifetime accidental shot. Billy feigned interest in his book, the devil in his head urged him to silence. He watched the snotty woman in a pale green sweater sip her coffee-surprise. Had she had chosen to be polite to him earlier he might have spoken up. Then again, he might not have.

Once she finished her gooey gift, Billy stood to leave and paused at her table.

“Good coffee?”

She looked up from her tablet, her face morphed into a sneer and she tutted. “It’s a latte, and I’m still not interested in someone,” she looked him up and down, “like you.” She dismissed him with a flick of her hand then gave her tablet her attention.

Billy sauntered away, as a slow, satisfied smile crept to his lips.

My advice about grossing out your readers.
If it gives you the heebie-jeebies or turns your stomach, it’s safe to use. My example was a very long way to say, – He picked his nose, flicked it into the shrew’s drink and watched as she drank it. – Blech.

-Sheryl

Don’t forget to check out, share and follow the new daily prompt I host. A new word every day!
Your Daily click

Today’s word is Abundant. https://onedailyprompt.wordpress.com/2018/10/04/your-daily-word-prompt-abundant-October-4-2018/

 

Six Word Story Challenge – Game

Six Word Story Challenge

Here is this week’s six-word story challenge. This prompt is now hosted by Wonderwall360 and Kirstwrites. Once a week they post a one-word prompt, and we get to create a six-word story in response. At the end of the week, there is a Poll for everyone to vote for their favorite story and the winners get a badge. Even if you don’t participate in the prompt, you can still vote for your top three picks at the end of the week.

The prompt this week is:

GAME

What six words would you use to tell a story about the word Game?

Join the fun and tell us a six-word story.

My story:

“The hunt’s on; we eat tonight.”

Come on over to tell your six-word story to this week prompt. Click on the image below to participate in this week’s prompt and leave your story in the comments to participate.

Six Word Story icon.pnghttps://kirstwrites.wordpress.com/2018/09/29/sixwordstorychallenge-29th-september-2018/comment-page-1/#comment-3162

Don’t forget to check out, share and follow the new daily prompt I host. A new word every day!
Your Daily click

Today’s Daily prompt was belated, despite delay’s it is up and ready for your inspiration.

https://onedailyprompt.wordpress.com/2018/10/02/your-daily-word-prompt-belated-October-2-2018/

Sensible Sensation – Throwback Thursday Style #TBT

Good morning, it’s Thursday, and that means I’m going to post a throwback from my earlier posts. Essentially a re-post of an old archived post with new notes and observations. 

tbt 3

Anything added(except grammar and spelling corrections) are marked in green within the original Post’s text. 

The next post I’m going to revisit is Sensible Sensation . Originally posted on Sep 17, 2016 3:06 PM. The reason I’m revisiting is that I’ve had to go back and add the five senses to my writing again when I revise. I wanted to remind myself to put it in in the first place.

 together

Sensible Sensation

Immersing the reader in the story is something I still strive to achieve. When writing it’s important to use all five senses. Smell, sight, taste, hear and touch. Now it’s not imperative every scenario have all five, but it can help plump up a drab sentence.

For fun, I’m going to highlight my crutch words and filters words in the examples using orange.

For example

Joe picked up the book from the desk. It was heavy and bound in black leather, it crackled when he opened it.

Yawn. I need to make this book more important, to focus on it and make Joe experience the book. To do this, I use a technique explained in The FAB pencil to describe the book better. This is not going to decrease word count by any means but is a great way to add words if that’s the goal. (While it is a yawn, the only reason I embellished is that the book is important. If the object has no value in the story, the above description is adequate.)

Now for fun, I’m going to add all five senses to this interaction and bring Joe and the book together like lovers on a moonlit night, instead of strangers on an awkward blind date. (This is a good exercise to do, one that I need to do more often.)

Hear

Joe picked up the heavy black book from the desk. The satisfying crackle of the leather floated to his ears as he opened the cover.

Touch

Joe picked up the heavy black book from the desk and ran his fingers over the hard, smooth surface. The satisfying crackle of the leather floated to his ears as he opened the cover.

Smell

Joe picked up the heavy leather-bound book from the desk. He ran his fingers over the hard, smooth surface. The satisfying sound of crackling leather filled the room as he opened the cover. He inhaled the musty scent of old paper and ink as it wafted to his nose.

Sight – this isn’t always necessary since he is clearly looking at the book. Depending on how important the book is, will depend on how much time I put into describing it and the interaction. This book is important, so it warrants a better description. At this point, I have decided that picking the book up doesn’t make sense. It’s unnecessary. (New note, sight is tricky, it often causes filter words to jump in and play. In these examples, I’ve already put Satisfying and crackling in and nowadays I’d take them out too. Peered can be a filter word. In most descriptions, if the other four senses are involved sight is implied. Look, looked, looking, see, saw, seen, peer, peered, peering, etc. are all filter words that can weaken a sentence. They also tend to be in sentences that TELL rather than SHOW the actions, emotions, etc.)

Joe peered down at the heavy black book on the desk. He ran his fingers over the hard, smooth surface and opened the cover. The satisfying sound of crackling leather filled the small room, as the musty scent of old paper and ink wafted to his nose.

Taste – I’m not likely to have him lick or eat the book, that would be weird. Maybe if this was a totally different scenario or he had a paper eating problem it would fit, however for this I’ll keep taste subtle.

Joe licked his salty lips as he peered down at the heavy black book on the desk. He ran his fingers over the hard, smooth surface and opened the cover. The satisfying sound of crackling leather filled the small room, as the musty scent of old paper and ink wafted to his nose.

If I were going to write this again now that I have more experience and know that there are more filter words and crutch words than I did at this point, it would look like this,

Joe’s tongue swept across his sweat salty lips. He traced the embossed letters in the smooth surface with his fingers before he opened the cover. As the nostalgic crackle of the black leather filled the small room, he wrinkled his nose at the musty scent of old paper and ink.

Removing the filter words and my crutch words(words I use too often) I was able to write a paragraph that I’m happy with.

Voila. Now Joe fully interacted with the book. Making him lick his lips also added emotion, depending on what came before this interaction it might be excitement, anticipation or nervousness maybe even fear.

My advice about senseless writing.
Take some time to make important objects blend into the story, make them become part of the experience and not a foreign object explained coldly. Basically, SHOW and don’t TELL. This is still good advice.

-Sheryl

Copyright © 2016 All rights reserved

Don’t forget to check out, share and follow the new daily prompt I host. A new word every day!
Your Daily click

Today’s word is Sonorous. https://onedailyprompt.wordpress.com/2018/09/27/your-daily-word-prompt-sonorous-september-27th-2018/

 

Six Word Story Challenge – Circus

Six Word Story Challenge

Here is this week’s six-word story challenge. This prompt is now hosted by Wonderwall360 and Kirstwrites. Once a week they post a one-word prompt, and we get to create a six-word story in response. At the end of the week, there is a Poll for everyone to vote for their favorite story and the winners get a badge. Even if you don’t participate in the prompt, you can still vote for your top three picks at the end of the week.

The prompt this week is:

CIRCUS

What six words would you use to tell a story about the word Circus?

Join the fun and tell us a six-word story.

My story:

“Couldn’t train animals; trained humans instead.”

Come on over to Wonderwall this week to tell your six-word story to this week prompt. Click on the image below to participate in this week’s prompt.

Six Word Story icon.pnghttps://wonderwall360.blog/2018/09/22/6word-story-saturday22nd-september-voting-9pm-gmt-thursday-27-9pm-gmt-28-september/comment-page-1/#comment-1845

Don’t forget to check out, share and follow the new daily prompt I host. A new word every day!
Your Daily click

 

Six Word Story Challenge – Friendship

Six Word Story Challenge 09/09/18

Here is this week’s six-word story challenge. This prompt is now hosted by Wonderwall360 and Kirstwrites. Once a week they post a one-word prompt, and we get to create a six-word story in response. At the end of the week, there is a Poll for everyone to vote for their favorite story and the winners get a badge. Even if you don’t participate in the prompt, you can still vote for your top three picks at the end of the week.

The prompt this week is:

Friendship

What six words would you use to tell a story about the word Friendship?

Join the fun and tell us a six-word story.

My story:

“The dog licked his boy’s hand.”

Come on over to Kirstwrites this week to tell your six-word story to this week prompt. Click on the image below to participate in this week’s prompt.

Six Word Story icon.png

Don’t forget to check out, share and follow the new daily prompt I host. A new word every day!
Your Daily click